Monday, 28 May 2007

MUFFins of Mayhem

bzzzzzz - slap. bzzzzzz - slap. bzzzzzzz - slap, slap, slap. bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

"Will you stop that?!" hissed O with a look of scorn at OKyle "They will hear you"

OKyle glanced at O with a mournful look and whispered "These blood sucking snails are everywhere. It feels like I've emigrated a thousand of them into each of my orifices and there is no sign of them letting up. I can't take it anymore" he almost screamed.

"Shhhhhhhhhhhhh" O warned again, with venom

Truth be told the flying snails with their needle like teeth was starting to dissolve Osservatore's sanity. The anticoagulant that the little buggers carry in their saliva acted as a mind warping stimulant which, considering their uncanny knack for finding places that don't want to be found, induced fits of rage filled paranoia. i.e. they made any unwelcome visitor to her lowness' lair, become a noisy moving target.

aS IF WALKING THROUGH A PORTAL - Hieronymous signalled the party to - shut the fuck up! He pointed tentatively towards a dimly lit clearing that seperated the forest from ze WALL that shot up into the dark sky. O saw it first. He had heard tales of these creatures. Tales so grim that they shouldn't be told.....

A BeAsT, walking on 6 legs , was coming into view. At shoulder height it was 6feet (bucket feet are pretty big) tall. It was covered in jet black hair with sickly green patched of what looked like dead skin dotting its whole body. Out of each patch a blood red spike protruded, giving it the appearance of a hedgehog that had been plucked, yet not.

A long neck slithered out of its bulbous body. Massive eyes, belying its intelligence dominated its facial features. EyEs that were looking for THEM!!

In mid thought, everything froze. A silence like none other heard anywhere everywhere descended upon everything.

OKyle smiled a smile of LoVe! The Buzzing had stopped! !!!!!!!!

He had met the one thing that could make a ludicrously loud, bloodsucking, paranormalic activity incuding sluggish fly, quiver in its TinY LiTTle bOOts.

He looked over to share his joy and thought - oFuck o Fell!@#............

The last thing that went through osservatore dela gente's mind before his panick induced hissy fit led him through a black hole into unchartered waters was "chocolate chip muffin", the smell of which filled his olfactory cavity with a decadent bitch slap !:!:!:!:!

The first thing he thought on his entry back into the bucket realm was - "WOWnesS - I've never had anything so delectable in my entiRe Existencial existence." the second was "Where is Psydeska? Where is that bugggggg?"

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